Bummer, man!

Coming home from a wicked ski trip with mixed emotions. Sad to leave the mountain behind, and the mystery of liking someone, after you've told them how you feel. Its one thing to share your feelings and come out of it kinda bummed. Its obviously cool or whatever but still kinda sucky at the same time. I'm resilient and told the truth. I never lied and hoped for the best, and waited until it hopefully wouldn't make life awkward to live. So here I am, knowing I tried. Nothing ventured, nothing gained? I ventured. Gained nothing. Never had it in the first place so there's really nothing to be TOO upset about, but obviously everyone knows how it feels, and yeah. Its a bummer. Takes the proverbial wind out of the sails a bit, however I know that I'm awesome and can be a good friend to him, so thankful in that respect. I care. Hands down. I care a lot about the people in my life who genuinely care about me and it'll be ok. I'll be fine. I'm still hoping though that one day I'll find someone.  If it never happens, then so be it. I'm not looking for help and I'm actually not even actively looking around for a man, I'm a pretty busy gal. Que sera sera, whatever will be will be, the futures not ours to see... however that would be pretty fuckin awesome.

Now onto my next adventure. West Coast 2013. 3 weeks. Vancity, Whistler and Tofino. This is yet again, going to be a pretty fuckin epic journey.

I love my life and my ability to live it amazingly. My Karma is generally good. So if you wanna bring me down, you can suck it, cuz its not gonna fuckin work, bitch!

Random thoughts...
-the keyboard on my phone kinda sucks. Writing blog entry wasn't easy.
- being pranked kinda sucks
- my bed is amazingly comfy
- the shotski is the best way to take shots.
- snowboarding rocks my fuckin socks

Ciao world.

This game is called "I WIN!"

Driven to write again. Go figure. New shit going on in life- upgrade in winter job title (very stoked), finally rode Tremblant, finally rode in November and that's all stuff that has to do with snowboarding. I'm continuing with yoga, which I love and I'm adding a new discipline to my life (other than holding back on being overtly physical with a guy I might like) which is Brazilian jiu jitsu. I am really really stoked on this, well both of the things I am trying to achieve discipline wise, but I feel like this is a new page of awesome I am turning and just like my new years resolution every year to just be increasingly more awesome, I think I may have now hit the nail on the head in the last month of 2012. Looking back on this year I have accomplished a few things I have set my mind to. Lining floors- did an AWESOME job this year, didn't fuck anything up and achieved a 5th term standing. Damn I'm near close to finishing this bitch of an apprenticeship. I'm good at my job, and like it. F YEAH! Snowboarding- set a new goal, rode Tremblant and did so in Nov which I already mentioned, became a Supervisor and got the CSIA ski certification. Again, F YEAH! Love life is still in the shitter, a little more time to devote to it this year but went on a couple good dates with a promising dude, and then yep- it went down the shitter because he pulled probably the DOUCHIEST move ever and then expected me to look past it? I don't think so.

This brings me to my newest motto in life. DON'T F WITH MY S. You F with my S and it's over. I think that's fair, don't you, internet reader? In my living life positively, being nice, friendly and generally accommodating I have had more people try to F with my S, and I'll tell you my reaction isn't nice. Take that morning I rolled into Durox floor supply in Scarborough. Not even 8am, and I have a man rudely say "What are you waiting for?" So I must respond in my have been on the road since 6am haven't had coffee and you've being a fucking prick attitude "I'm waiting for my crap, it's being picked, and I'm going to my jobsite. In this occupation I don't take crap from anyone, so don't talk to me like that" Then they got my order wrong. Assholes! I am a woman in construction. I also look young, and for some reason even though I am nearly 30 the men on site look and talk to me like I am a child. I am sick and tired of it. I also had a site super calling me outside of the job which I finished for half a week. I didn't pick up his calls. I'm done, you're over 50, fuck off. Other stories exist in my working and private life, but some things don't need to be shared on the internet. Drawing the line.

Thoughts & Feelings

• Don't F with my S
• Changing plans and habits is ok
• Good things come to those who wait
• Friendships sometimes need space, it doesn't mean anything negative
• Candy is perfectly acceptable at any time of day

Until Next Time...

New technology ftw

Wow. Getting a new phone is always exciting however this one is kinda nuts! Still not sure how to really use it but I guess I'll figure it out. Downloaded the neat blogger app for it. Three cheers for my new galaxy S3 and not knowing wtf to do with it!

Random thoughts
-fall is my favourite, it means winter is coming
-I hate cleaning
-it very well could be worse!

My latest findings in life... good? bad? hopeful? what?

Holla! So i've had some stuff happening that's been a real mindfuck lately, and not that it's bad or good... but it just is what it is.
I broke down at work because i was sick and emotional and really wanted to tell someone to just go fuck themself, but couldn't because sometimes you can't just do and say what you want. My dad helped me out and took over painting for me so i could just have a few minutes to just 'be'. A few days before, I got some news that I didn't want or like mind you, and couldn't fully rationalize how i felt about it because i was REALLY sick with the flu and it was Thanksgiving weekend. So I got really upset. fair enough. we all do. And then sometimes we just have to sit back and wait, which doesn't make it any better. Great fun.
Been feeling a little lonely lately, my summer is so busy that my friends stop calling... which sucks especially now, when work is slowing down and i can actually begin to make plans to do things like normal people.
I'm really realizing i'm becoming more and more jaded about the possibility of meeting someone, my love life is in the shitter, and has been for awhile and before that it was good for awhile, but before it ended up being a really BAD decision it was in the shitter and before that I was just fucking stupid. I think its all bollocks and i'm just not good at this whole relationship thing. I have horrible taste in men as i have found. In the last ten years I have had 2 real relationships, one was with a jackass and ended up cheating on me (he was hot, so i guess it was ok to be treated badly-NOT. Was just young and stupid) and the other... well. In a nutshell I thought he was awesome, and that everything was fine until one day he announces he needs space and i'm going home on half a week on the train. Which made things even MORE awesome was after we broke up, he pretty much had a girlfriend right away. I'm not a fucking retard. I knew what was going on. Thanks. My thoughts right around then were "and i was gonna marry you, you asshole". Right now, I have let these things go, and don't let them affect me... until I strung them together into a lovely chain of asshole, because i'm piecing together why shit just doesn't go my way. No wonder I'm a bitter and jaded bitch. HA!
I see friends making babies, creating families, getting married, buying homes/condos, moving in with their significant others... It's great, and I'm really happy for them... but am thinking to myself "what about me?" I don't think I actually want to have children... but maybe that's just right now, maybe not. All I know is that sometimes all this lovey dovey shit makes me wanna puke. Still bitter. still jaded.

One day MY prince will come... hopefully on a fuckin' snowboard ready to rip it up, and not looking for motherfucking barbie.

Random Thoughts...

- it's fall. that means snow is coming
- Thanksgiving. That meal is always awesome
- not working 6 day weeks anymore
- my birthday is around the corner, so let's get drunk.
- if you aren't doing 120kph, GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY WAY!
- on the same note: Left lane is for PASSING. once you've passed the car you want to, MOVE THE FUCK OVER!!

I was writing a blog post while in BC, but then I got busy...

AND then I got home, and got even more busy. Then close to 6 months goes by and you say "WHERE THE FUCK DID IT GO?!?!?!" So here I am, wondering where the fuckin' time went. OH YEAH! I went back to work. That's right.

The rest of my vacation was absolutely fabulous. Whistler blew my mind. I am going back this coming April for Telus fest again, except I think I shall go for the last week and weekend instead of the first. It's up in the air obviously still, but I am watching westjet's seat sales, to say the least. I cannot even tell you how many times I rode through fresh pow in the glacier yelling to myself "I am so fuckin' happy right now!!! I belong here!!" Yes, thats right. ONE more winter in Onterrible. I need to grow my skills some more, work with some amazing people like Keren and Ken, who know how to push me to be my best. I don't know if either of them will read this, but if they do, a big THANK YOU goes out to them, for sure. ALSO Whistler was so amazing I went back for a couple days. My last day on snow was April 28th. Felt great! Took my last run with a man named Jim Ryan, who used to teach at GE back in the 80's. Met him on the Jersey Cream chair. Small world!!

After Whistler, I took a wicked tiny plane (thanks Uncle Steve!) to Tofino to spend a week with Kim Marrie. One of my best friends for LIFE, and had a great week!! I was there for her through kidney stones the first day I was there, experienced a Toonie Tuesday at the Maq, (Maquinna`s pub) got messy, learned to SURF!! which was so awesome, spent time at Tonquin beach, drank A LOT and so on. We took the bus to Nanaimo to visit her brother Joe, his wife Danicka and their daughter Hannah for Easter. It proved to be an amazing weekend, met Danicka's family who were lovely, and had a great time. Tofino, Nanaimo and Courtenay are all great places! On Easter monday, I took the ferry back to the mainland. Sad to see the island go, but I'll go back some day!

Back to VanCity, tried to see a friend who never returned either the text I sent OR the call i made. His loss, but i think his head was wrapped up in work and female matters. Still would have loved to just have coffee. I digress... Spent more time with Uncle Steve, toured Gastown, Chinatown and then realized I still had time and money left- so BACK TO WHISTLER!!! Hopped on the Greyhound and stayed with a friend. Next morning, woke up and went to the mountain. Only Blackcomb was open, and thats ok, because I spent most of my day in the best place on bloody earth- Horstman Glacier. T-bar laps and fresh powder to slash up, not being able to see 5 ft in front of me at times, was bloody fuckin' glorious. Hopped down to glacier creek, had a bite to eat and headed back up. Just an epic day. I have NEVER been on snow on April 28th before, so I was stoked regardless. I headed up for what i thought would be my last runs, and on the jersey cream express, i chatted with an older gentleman. turns out he taught at Glen Eden back in the 80's! Jim Ryan was his name. we parted ways at the top of the lift. I decided to let my heart and supreme logic take me down the hill. I hit a run called cruiser- i was in for cruisin' so it felt like the right run. i came to a point where i had to make my next decision- keep on cruisin or take stoker. i was pretty stoked at the time, so obviously i chose stoker, and i chose so right!! FRESH POW still on the run 1/2 way down the mountain. EPIC! rode it out and went back up on the solar coaster- where i met Jim again. I informed him of the fresh pow i found, so he followed me down. we stopped to chat part way down, rode down to the village and parted ways. Such an amazing day! I left Whistler the next day, and went back to the city to help Uncle Steve, Marlo and Koel move into their new house!! Crazy moving weekend, and then came home... was happy to be home, but sad to leave the mountains and ocean. I'll be back though!

I mentioned I then got busy. Worked hard all summer, August and September were littered with 6 day work weeks... and I can tell you that neither the civic or labour day long weekends were actually long. I got to line the practice court at the ACC for the Raptors this summer, which was awesome, spent some time up north and saw my Nana and Aunt Marianne. I more recently went to Ottawa and saw Nikki for the first time in forever, which was excellent. Now work is slowing down and i'm looking forward to blogging more. so stay tuned!!

Stanley Park and Cypress- I love you.

Have I mentioned that I fuckin love it out here? Well there it is again. I have been here a week as of tomorrow and I have done a lot! First day was Grouse, family time on the weekend, Capilano Monday, bike tour Tuesday, now cypress Wednesday. Tomorrow is walking Granville. I love this place.

Tuesday- Stanley Park, bike tour and Granville island!
I went downtown with Steve and went to see the Olympic Cauldron, which was really freaking cool. Then I headed over to the pacific centre mall to check it out. Entered at holt renfrew and admired the expensive clothes, shoes and accessories. I then got the call from Dave that he was ready to go in a bit so I headed out to kits. Dave got the bikes together and took me on an epic journey to get lunch which was excellent and a tour of the seawall of Stanley Park. After a wicked ride, we then decided to ride false creek and the hit Granville Island. That place is awesome. My most favorite beer of life is there- cypress honey lager. So amazingly good!! Then went back to Dave's place and walked to dinner at The White Spot which is apparently a local favourite around the Vancouver area. I made it back to Richmond just in time to get some decent sleep before my wicked day at cypress!!!

Cypress was wicked. Hands down best hill near Vancouver. Pow up top on skyline chair... Or I think that's what it's called. Either way it was a good day. I rode the run maelle ricker won the gold on!! So good.

I have no random thoughts for this one as I'm behind, and now need to post about whistler!!!

I don't want to leave this place, but the pay sucks out here apparently!

The weekend ends and a wicked week ahead

The weekend was awesome. Saturday I stayed in Richmond with steve and his friends all came over starting at 3pm and we drank beer all night and played pool. Lots of fun was had for sure!!

Sunday I spent most of my day with Koel, Marlo and Mary at her place. She made a wicked roast beef dinner with scalloped potatoes, broccoli and cheese sauce, yorkshires and gravy. Delicious dinner!! Finished it off with donut dessert too! It's been years since I've seen Mary, and she's still the same lady I knew at 8 years old. Most lovely time catching up, playing scrabble and drinking tea!

This morning I left with steve and co to go downtown, and saw his office, which is wicked, and then went and grabbed timmy's and walked to Canada place to get the free shuttle to the capilano suspension bridge. Lovely tour to get there over the lions gate bridge. Got there and spent a good 4 hours Checking it all out. I walked all the way around and after found out that the only way to get my wicked certificate would be to do the passport which I had no idea about before I started. So I did it again, just a little quicker. So I got a bunch of wicked pics on my camera and only a couple on my iPod so you'll all have to wait til I get home to see full experience. It was pretty awesome. Did the treetop adventure, but cliffwalk wasn't open. If any one reading this wants to do the cliffwalk, seriously after June 2nd, unless they get set back.
After the bridge I headed down to lonsdale quay and walked straight up lonsdale road (huge ass hill) to check out the shopping and stuff in north van. Found a wicked purple fairy dress for Ryan and Tana's baby, a couple things I really liked and a new hat, as my toque was getting too warm. It's nice. I walked all the way up to the boardroom board shop and partway back as I got the bus to get to the ballpark up at the top of the hill.
The softball game was awesome! Boy do those young ladies have talent!! It was a great game. Hope I have a chance to see another before I leave!

All in all I had a wicked last few days, and I'm following it up with Stanley Park and the seawall tomorrow, then riding at cypress on weds, whistler on Friday!! Oh yeah!!!

Random thoughts:
-I love this place.
-people are really friendly here!
-one week until Tofino!

Love you all! Xoxo